What are you learning lately?

Once upon a time, I went on a retreat with my university's chapter of InterVarsity and a few hundred other IVCF members. The guy leading my small group told us the story of his and his wife's acquaintanceship. Apparently he had left a very unfavorable first impression on her, but despite her rebuff he stayed interested in her. (Don't go away. This is not a post on Christian dating. Stay with me!) So one day he's on Facebook and sees that she is online, so he messages her, "Hi!" She responds, "What has Jesus been teaching you lately?"

I heard that story quite a few years ago now, but that line is tucked away in my memory indelibly. You see, if that guy did not have an answer ready, he might not be married today. Again, this is not a post on dating. Or marriage. Or Christian pick-up lines. It is a post on learning. Christians all know somewhere in their minds that they should read the Bible. I read the Bible. But sometimes I have to ask myself: am I learning? am I paying attention or skimming verses? am I asking for the Lord to "open my eyes, that I may behold wonderful things out of thy word"?

Some mornings I share a devotional with my homeroom students. Some mornings I'm not expecting to share a devotional, but for any number of reasons (like my own forgetfulness) I find that I am. My students don't have a question for me to answer, so I ask myself, "What has Jesus been teaching you lately?" Unless I have been faithfully reading and studying the Word, taking it in thoughtfully and prayerfully and delightedly, I do not have an answer ready. What kind of witness is that to much younger Christians?

Last time: the point of my comment is not that a Christian should have an answer ready so he or she can impress a Christian of the opposite gender. Or anyone else for that matter. No no no.

But I should know what I'm learning lately. If I don't, I have to take a step back and ask myself if I'm learning at all. There is, after all, so much to learn at the feet of Jesus.

Two Things

Summative updates are not my forte. I hover indecisively on any given fact or anecdote, wondering what would interest both home and not-home readers. Then I give up and log off Blogger. Pardon, therefore, my very brief commentary on two things currently on my mind. Let's think of it as a desperate attempt to rout a rather embarrassing-for-an-English-teacher writer's block. 

First, there are so very many things to appreciate about life in Malawi that I don't put in writing that I really, really should. For example, my dear lovely friend called my mosquito net a "fort" on FaceTime the other day, giving me a new appreciation for the translucent walls-within-walls. (Shout out to the same friend who reminds me that some people really do read my blog.) Also, the walk down the hill to school each morning is a very pretty walk, everyone here greets whoever is walking past her, marigolds grow as wildflowers in some places, and a gecko is on my ceiling. 

Second, the other day I finished reading Teaching Redemptively, a book read probably exclusively by Christian teachers pursuing, considering, or at least cognizant of ACSI certification. The book was an overload of information, which I tried desperately to condense into easily reviewed and remembered notes with my thread-bound notebook and Sharpie pens, and I sincerely hope a few things stuck in my teacher-brain, which I consistently picture as an already-saturated sponge under a running faucet. Here's one thing I haven't [thankfully] been able to forget: a Christian teacher cannot hold on to past success or praise. 

Can we have a confession time? I hold on to past successes. Sometimes I tick them off in my mind, just to reassure myself of my supposed qualifications to impart knowledge, as though a successful teacher is something measured by numbers on score reports. I find that I still think this way, as if days and weeks of encountering challenges relating to students, coworkers, books, and staple shortages have taught me nothing. I don't have a class rank anymore; I'm not putting that old GPA on my resume; and whatever I got on standardized tests really doesn't matter. I've been in serious error and what can I do but pray for wisdom to depend on grace instead of GPAs long filed and gone?  

An Update. Simple. Straightforward.

As I walked out of ShopRite the other day, a red sun reminded me of the things I missed when I was home. I missed these sunsets, the way I missed teaching and purple birds and rooibos. I love being in this place where lantana grows the size of forsythia. I love being in this place where weather determines daily productivity rather than daily over-the-coffee-pot conversation.

I know I've not written much here since my return; in my defense, I've not written much of anything other than lesson plans and course objectives since my return. Free time does not appear in plentitude, though the things that fill my time continue to offer extensive and welcome stimulation.

Let me summarize. I have some new classes this year: two high school literature courses filled with all the best of the world's writers. Finally, I get to teach someone Tolstoy. It's marvelous. I'm again teaching the other Language Arts classes, as well as Journalism to a team of writers twice the size of last year's.

Most of my other activities have carried over from last year--attending Nyenyezi, assisting with youth group, holding chubby/adorable/now-walking baby Grace. (Look at how she's grown over the course of the year! What a sweet blessing to have watched her grow since our first meeting.)

The curriculum at Nyenyezi recently began again at Genesis for its weekly Bible lessons. Two weeks ago, talented teacher Ayati asked a few students to role play the story of Adam and Eve. The unnamed fruit of Genesis 3 was an unripened mango in our adaptation. These terrific actors managed to eat that colorless mango unreservedly. 

Blessings abound, as usual. At the risk of sounding repetitive to my loyal readers, I have to say that again I am grateful for the grace with which God fills each day, showing his love and mercy in new ways over and over again to the most unworthy. How can I but be filled with thankfulness? 

Back in Malawi

Most of my acquaintance know that I'm back in Malawi for a second school year. If any of my readers missed the memo, here I am! Back in Malawi for a second school year.

School starts tomorrow. I've settled back into my old room, which looks new thanks to the generosity and creativity of the fabulous housing coordinators here on campus; I've set up my classroom, which looks old thanks to a lack of truly appealing posters (student work will fill the blank spots on the walls soon, I trust); I've recognized one by one the things that I missed about this place.

The recurring rose gold sunsets. The bustling roads. The expanses of red dirt. The presence of dear friends. The inexplicable happiness of walking around school and preparing for students.

The days are filled with long lists of tasks and responsibilities in preparation for school, but even these are insufficient to keep me from enjoying being here again.

It's a little odd to feel that I just left home and came to a different place that I can't help but call home, but even this is a poignant reminder that no matter how comfortable I feel in a place, or how uncomfortable I feel leaving a place, the only place I'll truly belong is in the middle of God's will. That truth seems to slip my mind all too often, but it's the one thing that makes me feel most settled where I am called to be just now. For that, of course, I'm unwaveringly thankful.

Not in the wind, not in the earthquake, not in the fire

The chapters of the Bible devoted to the life of Elijah inspire high thoughts of God. Elijah prayed for God to show His glory to the leaders of false religion and God answered with fire from heaven. Elijah sent his servant to look out over the sea for rainclouds, and when the smallest hint of one appeared, he sent that servant to warn Ahab of the coming downpour. He was taken to heaven in a chariot of flames.

Yet one day, Elijah hid away in a cave and prayed that God would take away his life. He was hunted and afraid and exhausted. He prayed for death.

God sent a great wind, an earthquake, and a fire--and none of these dramatic scenes revealed God's presence to Elijah as did what followed--a still, small voice. God did not answer the suicidal prophet with a show of glory or overwhelming display of might, but rather with a whisper that said, "What are you doing here, Elijah?"

As I pack up my school supplies from my classroom, take down the scrawls of favorite poems from the walls, and fold up clothes to send to the village, I reflect on what's been a long, long year of startling winds, earthquakes, and fires.

None of these dramatic scenes revealed God's presence to me as did what followed--a still, small voice. Many were the times when I wondered, "Why would God ordain these things to happen to me over the course of this year? Isn't it too much? Why couldn't things have gone precisely the way I wanted them too?"

It doesn't matter, really. God guides through what he ordains to happen; I have to believe that. And when I think of how much I've learned and changed, I can't help but anticipate a year ahead. I return home this week, but I'll be back in Malawi to teach again, trusting the same God who guided a great prophet to Horeb, where He revealed His presence and His plan.

"And the angel of the Lord came again the second time, and touched him, and said, 'Arise and eat; because the journey is too great for thee. And he arose, and did eat and drink, and went in the strength of that meat forty days and forty nights unto Horeb the mount of God." {i kings 19.7-8}

Daily life, or, perhaps it's time for an update

Some of my greatest heroes of the faith include female Christian writers who beautifully describe why the gospel matters to everyday living. Elisabeth Elliot, for one, explains the importance of an orderly and godly family life in The Shaping of a Christian Family. Leslie Ludy describes how modesty, humility, gentleness, and order in everyday life are evidence of a heart committed to the Lord in Set Apart Femininity. Anne Ortlund is very practical with her mantra of "eliminate and concentrate" in Disciplines of a Beautiful Woman. Each of these books has contributed to the value I have found in living a life committed to the Lord--committed not only through confession, but also through practice. For me, this includes embracing order, structure, organization, and thereby beauty.

I live on a schedule during the week--moderate rather than stringent, but a schedule nonetheless. I get up absurdly early--"while it is yet night"--to exercise (and chat!) with a friend, to have plenty of time to prepare both my appearance and my heart for the day, and to open my classroom a bit earlier than necessary so I'm ready to welcome and teach my 11th-graders.

In the afternoons, I either continue working (life of a teacher!), work out with some great (and athletic beyond my limits) friends, visit Nyenyezi (Thursdays only), or go out (read: buy food). Evenings are generally scheduled for me, between ladies' Bible study, campus Bible study, youth group, and campus potluck. Things change up (a little), but the routine is generally the same--and glory be, it's rhythmic, manageable, and ever so enjoyable for a number of reasons.

First of all, when I follow an orderly schedule, I have immeasurably more time to spend reading, praying, writing, and thinking through things. The soul's stamina increases dramatically when that soul is fed with God's Word regularly and significantly.

Furthermore, I can be a better teacher. My lessons are ready-to-go the moment students walk in the door, and I make them feel welcomed (I hope) by sharing a fun PowerPoint on adjectives or asking a thought-provoking question about life that will relate to the day's discussion.

Finally, I can enjoy sweet moments of a great variety. Sometimes it means noticing the glorious sunset, or having coffee with a friend. Sometimes I can chat with students or campus kids or other teachers. Sometimes I can read a book that speaks to my heart for hours, candle burning and chai tea within reach. When I structure and organize the time I have, I find there is more time that can be enjoyed.

And when moments are enjoyed, how I can I help but be ever more grateful for the revealed creativity, glory, and goodness of a wondrous God?

An update (with pictures!)

I have been busy. Hasn't everyone?

Two weekends ago I attended my fabulous friend's bridal shower at the best cafe in Lilongwe. We all but took over.

Two weeks ago I played lots of Sorry with four exceptionally fun kids. I told you about that already.

What I didn't tell you was that during that week, I spent one afternoon getting one of my wards--and her four friends--primped for their performance at the ABCCA talent show. The girls danced to "Happy" and it was adorable. I took a break from selling hotdogs to get a video...and a terrible from-the-back row photo of the stage.

Promptly after my extended babysitting gig, I spent a long weekend at Nkhata Bay, which is a wondrously beautiful place a bit north on the lake. I spent four days relaxing, swimming, reading, and getting to know some great people a bit better.  

Last Thursday I headed to Chinsapo for the usual kids' Bible club, but it was far from usual! A team of short-termmers did a special presentation to the whole crowd of 800 kids at once. With the help of a very skilled interpreter, they shared the story of the father and his two sons. 

This past weekend I spent time by the pool and looked up at this sky. 

I also spent more than enough time in the kitchen, making more than enough food to feed myself and my housemates--BUT my housemates were away for most of the weekend. It was a sad and lonely 2 1/2 days. 

Finalmente, I spent Easter with some wonderful friends, including this sweet guy! (and Sydney :) )

Spring break has been a blessing so far. The best, however, is yet to come. I will publish another update roughly this time next week to share. (hint: my mom and sister are coming for a visitor. Did I say "hint"? I meant "spoiler.")