Two Things

Summative updates are not my forte. I hover indecisively on any given fact or anecdote, wondering what would interest both home and not-home readers. Then I give up and log off Blogger. Pardon, therefore, my very brief commentary on two things currently on my mind. Let's think of it as a desperate attempt to rout a rather embarrassing-for-an-English-teacher writer's block. 

First, there are so very many things to appreciate about life in Malawi that I don't put in writing that I really, really should. For example, my dear lovely friend called my mosquito net a "fort" on FaceTime the other day, giving me a new appreciation for the translucent walls-within-walls. (Shout out to the same friend who reminds me that some people really do read my blog.) Also, the walk down the hill to school each morning is a very pretty walk, everyone here greets whoever is walking past her, marigolds grow as wildflowers in some places, and a gecko is on my ceiling. 

Second, the other day I finished reading Teaching Redemptively, a book read probably exclusively by Christian teachers pursuing, considering, or at least cognizant of ACSI certification. The book was an overload of information, which I tried desperately to condense into easily reviewed and remembered notes with my thread-bound notebook and Sharpie pens, and I sincerely hope a few things stuck in my teacher-brain, which I consistently picture as an already-saturated sponge under a running faucet. Here's one thing I haven't [thankfully] been able to forget: a Christian teacher cannot hold on to past success or praise. 

Can we have a confession time? I hold on to past successes. Sometimes I tick them off in my mind, just to reassure myself of my supposed qualifications to impart knowledge, as though a successful teacher is something measured by numbers on score reports. I find that I still think this way, as if days and weeks of encountering challenges relating to students, coworkers, books, and staple shortages have taught me nothing. I don't have a class rank anymore; I'm not putting that old GPA on my resume; and whatever I got on standardized tests really doesn't matter. I've been in serious error and what can I do but pray for wisdom to depend on grace instead of GPAs long filed and gone?